Wed's Joke corn-ey but funny :)

At Saint Mary's Catholic Church they have a weekly husband's marriage seminar. At the session last week, the Priest asked Luigi, who was approaching his 50th wedding anniversary, to take a few minutes and share some insight into how he had managed to stay married to the same woman all these years.

Luigi replied to the assembled husbands, 'Well, I've a-tried to treat-a her nice, spend the money on her, but best of all is that I took-a her to Italy for the 20th anniversary!'

The Priest responded, 'Luigi, you are an amazing inspiration to all the husbands here! Please tell us what you are planning for your wife for your 50th anniversary.' Luigi proudly replied, 'I'm a-gonna go and get her.'

Wow I had some very exciting days off this week :)

I got the strangest phone call from my dad this morning wanting to know what I was doing today. I told him I didn't have much going on ... other than PT for my neck and back. He then asked about what time would I return home. I told him about 1pm. He said great I will meet your there I have something I need you to do with me today. I went ok and hung up. Then before I left for PT my curiosity got the best of me and I called him and asked what he needed my help for. He said never mind you will see. Ok then I knew it was a surprise.. now what kind of surprise.... I don't know but surprise it was!!! My dad drove me 45 miles west of me to a small town called Yoder that is where a lot of our local Amish people live. In this small town they were having what they called a quilt parade. It is a yearly thing where they have all of their handcrafted and hand quilted quilts on display for sale. Oh my goodness my dad took me to every store that had those marvelous quilts in them. My dad really liked the ones with the blues and I was more burgundy and shades of pinks and wines. I loved seeing all of these wonderful quilts.. My dad is such a doll to think of me when he heard this quilt parade was going on. He told one of his friends when he heard the advertisement on the radio... I think I'll surprise my daughter with a trip over there. I know she will love it.... and Love it I did. My dad is such a sweetheart spending the day with me like that!!!! I will treasure this day for the rest of my life. It was one of those Kodak moments is my life :) I brought home the little map-let that told all about those wonderful quilts to put in my scrapbook ... of my treasured moments in my life :) Heck.... I even put my name in a drawing to win one of these fantastic quilts. We will see if I win :) I will be floored if I win one of them...but stranger things have happened!!!!

I took Pitty Pat over to see her mommy yesterday. Pitty Pat goes to see her mom at least twice a year. As I promised the breeder that I would bring her back so she could see her. Ms M had a really really hard time letting Pitty Pat come home with me. She made me promise that I would bring her back so she could see her. So good to my word we go over now and then to see her. Pitty just love the little boy that lives in the house she is all licks and jumps when she sees little G man :) You wonder to yourself???? hum why does she have that photo of sheep up above?? Well while I was standing on the porch getting ready to leave Ms M says look I think a ewe is lambing. Sure enough I looked over and there it was on the ground. I watched a while as it got up on its little wobbly legs and stood. The we noticed another ewe laying down getting up pawing at the ground. This concern Ms M so she went got her shoes and coat on. We went out to the pasture to check her out just in case she needed some help. By the time we got out there she had the baby without any trouble at all. Then when we were watching for it to get up, the first ewe with baby starting pawing ground. Then pop here was a second baby. Both of those babies were black in color. The single baby was black in color also. What is amazing about this story is an older ewe came to help the younger ewe tend to her baby. Then all of a sudden the older ewe started in labor... well some of the other ewes came to see what was going on ... I tell you this old ewe would not have any of those other ewes bothering that baby. She got into real head butting with a couple of them... this was when this poor ole thing had a baby on its way out... man she was a tough old gal. I would not wanted to be on the receiving end of her when she was keeping everyone away!!! She finally settled down and pop here was her baby. The single baby finally got up on its really really long legs compared to the other ones during all this commotion. I left before the old gals baby got up as it was starting to get really cold and windy outside. But I am just amazed at how fast those babies can get up and bounce around after being born. I bet they were up with in 15 mins of birth!!! That's fast!!! I hope you enjoyed hearing about my fun time with all the baby lambs. Ms M said there was a total of 14 birthed that day :) And there was several more to come in the next few days ;)

LOOK LOOK I won I won !!!! LOL.... I even forgot I entered into this fantastic apron drawing for Valentines day :) It looked like 48 women entered into the drawing and my name was plucked out of the hat!!! I for one would have never guess in a million years I would own one of these fabulous aprons from Beverly..... Isn't it fantastic???? I am so lucky!!!! Thank you Beverly at Sew On and Sew Fourth for such a wonderful fun and romantic apron. It's a real treasure to own :)

I didn't get as much sewing done as I wanted to this weekend..but who cares when you have wonderful days like I had :) I hope you enjoyed this entry... I really did have a great weekend :)

Taken from A Dress A Day Blog

Margo left a comment recently asking me how I bought fabric. I thought replying just "Like a drunken sailor on shore leave, if drunken sailors bought fabric" probably wasn't helpful, so I thought I would lay out some rules for buying fabric that have served me well over the last few decades.

1. You never have enough fabric. If you tell yourself "I have enough fabric," you jinx yourself and will immediately need more fabric (except now that you've angered the fabric gods, everything will be horribly polyester and $15/yard). You ALWAYS need more fabric.

2. If offered an opportunity to shop for fabric, take it. You never know when you're going to need more fabric (oh, wait -- yes you do know, and the answer is "all the time" -- remember rule one: "You always need more fabric"?). So take advantage of every opportunity to shop for fabric.

3. If it is $1/yard and not aggressively hideous, buy three yards. If it's $1/yard and acceptable, buy five yards. If it's $1/yard and, if the fabric were a man [or woman] you would agree to meet him [or her] for coffee (but not a dinner date) buy ten yards. Any liking over that requires a fifteen- to twenty-yard purchase.

4. The basic unit of fabric purchase is four yards of 45" or three of 60" wide. Any less than that and you won't be able to get a fullish skirt out of it. If it has a large repeat (the amount of space it takes to repeat the pattern) or is a border print, or has stripes, or really, anything out of the ordinary, buy five yards. Don't bother carrying yardage for specific patterns with you: if you do buy exactly enough for a particular pattern, you will then cut out one piece wrong and when you go back out to buy more it will be all gone.

5. If you really, really, really love it, buy it right then. Otherwise it will sell out in less than 24 hours. (The corollary to this rule is that fabric you hate will clot the tables and racks at the fabric store until the place goes out of business or burns to the ground.)

6. If the fabric is too expensive to buy at least two yards, or is less than 40" wide, you can still buy it, but only as an objet d'art. You will never make a garment out of it. As long as you accept this up front, you'll be fine. (I have a one-yard piece of Matisse-print "Jazz" silk that I just pick up and look at every once in a while. It was $10/yard when that was astronomically expensive for me.)6a. If you regularly wear halter tops rule 6 does not apply to you. But you will be making a LOT of halter tops. (Note: conversion from non-halter-top-wearing to halter-top-wearing just to use up your stash is not recommended.)

7. The proper ratio of prints to solids in your fabric purchasing is 10:1. The rationale for this is that good prints are fleeting but solids are always available. In fact, you should never actually have any black fabric in your stash. That is because keeping black fabric in your stash means you won't have a reason to go to the fabric store when you need black fabric, which would contravene rule 2.

8. If you make theatrical costumes, or participate in historical reenactments, or have ever thought "Someday I am going to make the Kinsale Cloak" you may only buy velvet in 20-yard increments.

9. Always make time to buy fabric when traveling. Global Economy, Schmobal Economy. They got different stuff there, wherever "there" is. Pack an extra bag, if you have to.

10. If you think, while looking at fabric, "I'd have no place to wear this, even IF I made it into anything," close your eyes and envision yourself in tears of rage and disappointment, having been invited at the last minute [but with enough time to sew something] to JUST the perfect place to wear something made of that fabric. The most horrible thing in the world is regret: protect yourself from it by buying fabric. And besides, how dumb will you feel when you're freezing to death in the coming nuclear winter/ecological catastrophe, if you don't buy five yards of that wool now?

11. Fabric bought online doesn't "count" against any self-imposed quotas (quotas which violate rules 1 and 2 anyway). Fabric purchased on eBay DOUBLE doesn't count.

Further thoughts: if you have small children, raise them in the belief that the fabric store is the best place in the world to go, ahead of Disney and Chuck E. Cheese. Resort to bribery if necessary. (Also teach them the "one finger rule": they can touch ANYTHING in the store that adults are allowed to touch, if they do so with only one finger. [Check that the finger is clean!] First violation is a warning. Second violation, they must clasp their hands on top of their head for the remainder of the visit.)
Know to the minute how long it takes you to get to each fabric store in your area. This will allow you to plan quick anonymous stops between other errands.It is better to go to the fabric store without a particular fabric in mind. When the buyer is ready, the true fabric will appear.So Margo, I hope this helps you, but I'm afraid I cannot be held liable for the size of the stash that will come from following any of these rules. Obey at your own risk.

Vintage Inspired Apron

Skill Level
Experienced Beginner
Materials
Pattern (found at the end of the instructions)
1⁄2 yard (45.7 cm) of fabric for the front
1⁄4 yard (22.9 cm) of fabric for the pockets
1⁄4 yard (22.9 cm) of fabric for the waistband and ties
1 package of rickrack
Thread
Interfacing
1 package of bias tape
Tools & Supplies
Access to a photo copier that enlarges images
Fabric shears
Scissors
Tape measure
Pins and needles
Sewing machine
Iron and ironing board
Seam Allowance
1⁄4" (6 mm), unless otherwise noted

Instructions
Copy and enlarge the pattern pieces found at the end of the instructions as indicated.
Cut out the apron pieces as directed. Set them aside.
Finish the outer edges of the front of the apron, so they won’t unravel. On the right side of the fabric, place the rickrack along the outer edges with its centerline 1/4" (6 mm) from the edge. Stitch the rickrack down the center. Fold the fabric and the rickrack under along the stitch line and press. Turn and topstitch along the fold as close to the fold line as possible.
As in step 3, finish the outer and inner edges of the pocket, and then attach the rickrack to the right side. Fold the fabric and the rickrack under along the stitch line and press. Turn and topstitch the inner edge of the pocket. Repeat to make a second pocket.
Attaching the Pockets
Pin the pockets, right sides up, to the right side of the apron front, aligning the notches. Stitch across the top of the pocket and around the sides, close to the rickrack.
Fuse the interfacing to the wrong side of the waistband. With wrong sides together, fold the waistband lengthwise down the center and press.
Pin the waistband to the top of the apron with right sides together, making sure the waistband extends 1/4" (6 mm) beyond either side (figure 1). Stitch, then press the seam allowances toward the waistband.

Making the Tie
To create the tie, fold under the long side twice to make a 3⁄8" (1 cm) double hem. Press and stitch. To make a point, fold one end of the tie diagonally with right sides together, and then stitch it down along the long side, 3⁄8" (1 cm) from the edge. Turn the corner right side out, press, and then stitch the remaining long edge of the tie with a 3⁄8" (1 cm) double hem. Topstitch the point. Finally, create a pleat in the raw end of the tie that attaches to the apron. Repeat for the other tie.
With right sides together, pin the ties to the waistband, aligning the ties with the waist seam. Using the center line as a guide, fold the waistband over the ties. Stitch the ends to secure the ties (figure 2) then turn the waistband right side out.

On the wrong side of the front, fold the raw edge of the waistband under, and pin it over the waist seam. On the apron front, topstitch along the edges of the waistband.

Template Pattern

Cosmopolitan Apron

Skill Level
Experienced Beginner
Materials
Pattern (found at the end of the instructions)
1 yard (91.4 cm) of fabric
8-1/4 yards (7.5) of 1/4" (6mm) double-fold bias tape
Thread
Fusible interfacing
3⁄4" (1.9 cm) button
Tool & Supplies
Access to a photo copier that enlarges images
Fabric shears
Scissors
Pins and needles
Tape measure
Sewing machine
Iron and ironing board
Water-soluble fabric pens
Transfer pencils
Sewing gauge
Seam ripper
Seam Allowance
1/2" (1.3 cm)

Instructions
Copy and enlarge the pattern pieces found at the end of the instructions as indicated.
Cut out the apron pieces as directed. Set them aside.
Splice together the packages of bias tape to create one long piece.
Assembling the Pockets
Sew the pocket linings to the lower front, wrong sides together, with a 5⁄8" (1.6 cm) seam (figure 1).

Encase the top edges of the pocket with bias tape, stretching it slightly at the inner curve while stitching through all thicknesses. Trim the bias tape ends even with the edges.
Sew the pocket back to the pocket lining along the double-notched edge, right sides together (figure 2).

Baste the pockets to the lower front below the diamonds, then stitch 3⁄4" (1.9 cm) all around the bottom curved edge (figure 3).

Stitch bias tape to the bottom curved edge.
Sew the ties to each side of the upper front piece using a 5⁄8" (1.6 cm) seam. Zigzag close to the seam, and then trim the seam. Press the seam toward the center of the upper front.
Making the Neck Straps
Sew the neck straps to the upper front piece using a 5⁄8" (1.6 cm) seam. Press the seam toward the neck straps.
Stitch all the way around the upper front, including the neck straps and ties, with a 3⁄4" (1.9 cm) seam allowance, as shown in figure 4.

Mark the buttonhole on the right side of the left neck strap. Cut a rectangle of interfacing 2" x 1" (5.1 cm x 2.5 cm). Pin it to the wrong side of the fabric where you wish to make a buttonhole, but don’t fuse it to the fabric. Stitch the buttonhole, then turn the fabric over and trim the interfacing close to the stitching, being careful not to cut the stitching.
Lap the wrong side of the upper front piece onto the right side of the lower front piece, using the previously stitched placement line. Align the center lines, the sides, and the pocket dots. Baste the two pieces together (figure 5).

Apply bias tape to the upper front piece. Start on the left neck strap, and encase the upper front around the right neck strap, and tie. When sewing the bias tape around the outer curves of the neck strap and ties, stop before the curve with your needle in the fabric. Position the tape around the curve 1" (2.5 cm) at a time by hand. Gently pivot the fabric while taking five to six stitches. Stop, again with the needle down, and without raising the pressure foot, reposition the next inch (2.5 cm) of fabric, and continue on, pivoting and sewing as you go.
When you get to the edge where the upper front meets the lower front, stitch through all thicknesses to attach the two pieces until you get 2" (5.1 cm) from the center point. Stop with the needle down, and then guide the bias tape to the center point with your fingers. Miter the bias tape at the center point. Continue stitching around the apron until you’ve encased the entire upper front piece. Fold the trim over, and lap over the start of the bias tape.
Remove the stitching for the placement line. Trim the seam joining the upper front to the lower front to 1/2"(1.3 cm), being very careful not to cut the fabric underneath.
Cut a small square or dot of interfacing, and fuse it to the wrong side of the right neck strap where you wish to place the button. Sew the button on through the fabric and the interfacing.
Pattern Template

I want one of these!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This would be perfect for a quilter :)

Neck Ribbon Caddy

Supplies
1 1/8 yard (103cm), 1½” (3.8cm) wide blue plaid ribbon
1 1/8 yard (103cm), 1½” (3.8cm) wide blue grosgrain ribbon
½ yard (45.5cm) 3/8” (1cm) wide blue grosgrain ribbon
1 tape measure
1 handful polyester stuffing
Red felt scraps
Embroidery scissors, thimble, sewing gauge
Here’s how
1.Cut: Make a heart pattern. Cut one 1 1/8” x 4½” (2.8 x 11.5cm) pocket strip and 2 hearts from felt scraps. Cut 3/8” (1cm) wide grosgrain ribbon in 2 equal lengths. Cut tape measure off at 39½” (100.5 cm).
2. Assemble: Center and pin felt pocket strip to one end of plaid ribbon. Zigzag or use a decorative stitch along sides of felt pocket. Loop one narrow ribbon through scissors. Pin ribbon ends at raw edge of plaid ribbon and machine baste. Layer heart motifs together. Edgestitch, leaving 1¼” (3.2cm) top opening. Fold other narrow ribbon in half; center and tack fold to inside heart pocket. Center and machine baste ends to other plaid ribbon raw edge. Center tape measure on wide grosgrain ribbon. Edgestitch tape on all sides. With right sides together, stitch wide grosgrain to plaid ribbon with ¼” (6mm) seam across “heart” pocket end. Turn and press. With wrong sides together. edgestitch ribbon sides.
3.Pin Cushion: Measure 4¼” (11cm) from open end, stitch across. Stuff tightly. Turn ¼” (6mm) raw edges inside and stitch closed.

Cream-Filled Cupcakes from Allrecipes.com

3 cups all-purpose flour
2 cups sugar
1/3 cup baking cocoa
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 cup milk
1 cup vegetable oil
1 cup water
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Filling:
1/2 cup butter, softened
2 cups confectioners' sugar
3 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Pinch salt

1. In a mixing bowl, combine the first five ingredients. Add eggs, milk, oil, water and vanilla. Beat until smooth, about 2 minutes. Fill paper-lined muffin cups half full. Bake at 375 degrees F for 15-20 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Remove from pans to wire racks to cool completely.

2. In a mixing bowl, combine butter, confectioners' sugar, milk, vanilla and salt; beat until fluffy, about 5 minutes. Insert a decorating tip into a pastry or plastic bag; fill with cream filling. Push the tip through the top of each cupcake to fill.

3. Frost tops with chocolate frosting or glaze, and pipe a white squiggly line on top.

Towel Turned Apron

Apron Tutorial from Crafty Daisy's

Convert a kitchen towel into a full apron. This is a quick 30 minute project and who can resist with such cute prints out there!

First, Run a needle and thread in and out evenly very close to the trim and draw it to the tightness of gathering you like. I loved this towel because it had the rust colored trim on the top and bottom already.

Then pin your ribbons (20") in place and sew over the gathering, making sure it IS wrinkled under the needle and that the fabric doesn't flatten out. I also burn the edges of the ribbon with a lighter so that is does not unravel, very lightly so you don't change the color of the ribbon.

Lastly, measure 2 ribbons 28" long and measure where you want to tie your apron. (at your waist line) Burn the ends of the ribbon and pin them into place. Pin along the underside on right and left edges of the towel. Then sew just over the ribbon, along the original towel seam. Voila!!!

I don't know about you girls but I think a person would have to be very thin to be able to have a tea towel cover them up!!!!!

Will A Hamburglar Steal it?????

Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!!!!!! I finally got to drop off my second toy for the month of Feb today. The Pitty Pat and I drove into Ta town, where we went to the local Ronald McDonald house. If you don't know what that is..... Wells its like a hotel...... Its a huge house where families of very sick children, can stay while their loved one is in the hospital.... I am not familiar with the requirements or the arrangement.. But I think it is low cost or no cost for the families :)

I could not figure out where I wanted to leave my adorable doll. I had to go visit my brother in a smaller town North of me about 15 miles. I thought I was going to leave it at their Hospital ER. But after telling my brother about the toy drop he said they would probably consider it a bomb and blow it up!!!! Oh my goodness that would never do for such a sweet toy!!!! I didn't know what to do then... so I put on my thinking cap and low and behold. I decided I would leave it at the Ronald McDonald's house in Ta Town. So I drove myself back by my house and then 20 miles south of me to leave off this toy. I was more than happy to drive it that far :) to find it a loving child. I will tell you ..... I am really enjoying making these toys to give away. I get a warm fuzzy feeling all over when I know its going to make someones bad day better :) After I finish posting I have to go make a boy toy next :) I think I just might drop it off at the Ronald McDonald house also :) So here is my little girl waiting for someone to love her and take her home :)

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe, well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.
Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece, gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a glorious and all conquering past.
Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel, has been through war and doesn't make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada, self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.
After 70, she becomes Tibet, wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages...only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran , ruled by nuts.